January 22, 2021
To my Rainbow Baby,
Today, I am 35 weeks pregnant! Oh my sweet little babe, do you realize how much you are loved? Do you know how many people have been praying for and anticipating your arrival? You truly have a village surrounding you of people that have supported your momma through this entire process. From the beginnings of infertility through IVF and now through this pregnancy, so many people have been surrounding us with their love, prayers, and support because they are so excited about the little miracle that you are and they just cannot wait for you to be here. I hope you can feel that love as you finish up your time in my belly.
On Sunday, in the strangest way imaginable because of this pandemic, this village surrounded us from behind their computer screens to shower us with love and gifts to prepare for your debut. It was a bit of a whirlwind, as I did my best to see everyone who joined us in their little box on our Zoom screen. Your Gammaw managed the technology and the guest with such grace, making sure everyone got to see me open their gifts. I was sad not to be able to hug them, talk to them more, and thank them face-to-face for their love and gifts, but I also know that we would not have had so many people to love on us if we had done a shower in-person, even without a pandemic. We had people joining us from Ohio, Pennsylvania, Maryland, Indiana, New Jersey, and California. Some of those people would not have been able to make the trip to see us, but almost all of them were able to hop on their computers for a few hours to join us from afar. That was such an incredible blessing- I felt so much virtual love poured out through that computer screen and I’m ever so grateful that God has surrounded us with these amazing people to help support us into this next chapter of our lives.
And now, other than continuing to organize and arrange things in your nursery, we are completely ready for your arrival!! We have a carseat to bring you home in and a bassinet for you to sleep in when you are tiny and new. We have a crib mattress to lay you on when you are ready to sleep in the nursery, and a tub to bathe you in to keep that newborn smell fresh. We have so many sweet little onesies to dress you, tons of diapers that we’ll probably go through faster than I can imagine, and bottles to feed your little tummy. Every person who showed us such love during my shower also showed us such generosity by making sure we can take care of your physical needs, too. God has truly blessed us with an amazing community and I am so certain that, no matter what motherhood throws my way, these amazing people will be there to love and support me through it.
At the top of that list of amazing people is your Gammaw. She did so much to make sure that this crazy pandemic shower would still be a wonderful and loving way to celebrate your impending arrival. She and your Pup Pup wrapped so many gifts so there would still be an element of anticipation for me. They both helped us get your nursery set up so that we could have the shower in your room and show all of your loved ones how their generosity would surround you with love there. She brought some decorations and some sweet cookies so that she and I could still have a bit of shower fun even though all of our guests would be far away. And she showed us so much generosity in all the gifts she gave us to help us have the nursery of our dreams and have all we could want and need for you when you finally get. It isn’t just your mommy who’s been dreaming of your arrival for years- your Gammaw has been dreaming of you too and we are just so grateful to finally be able to do all these things and celebrate the miracle God has given us.
Today, you are the size of a pineapple. You are a little over 18 inches long and a little over 5 pounds! You have nails on your little fingers and toes, and your kidneys are fully developed. You won’t get much longer in your growth, but that baby fat is still packing on- still about one more pound to go! You’ve been listening to all sorts of things going on out here and there’s a chance you can recognize daddy’s voice in addition to mommy’s. I’m definitely feeling an increase in discomfort by the day. My back aches, you are squishing my bladder big time, and since my uterus is now 1000 times its normal size, sometimes it’s hard to breath. I’m doing my best to take all of this in stride, as I know I’ve been blessed with a smooth and healthy pregnancy. I just continue to ask God to provide me comfort, run to the bathroom when I can at work, and remind myself that every ache and pain is worth it to have you still growing healthy and strong in there.
I pray God will continue to protect you and allow these last few weeks of your development to be healthy. Starting Monday, Momma will be going to the doctor for non-stress tests twice a week to make sure things are good in there, since she’s considered granny pregnant! So I pray that those test will all go smoothly. It feels like we still have a huge list of things to do, so I pray God will provide us both with the patience, energy, and time to get everything done, and will give me peace of mind that it’ll all be okay if I don’t cross everything off. I just praise Him and thank Him again for the beautiful shower we had and for all the people who love us and showed us such generosity. We are so grateful for all of you. I place all of these things in His hands next week and ask that He do His will.
I love you, little Rainbow Baby.
Love, Mommy
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