October 23, 2020
To my Rainbow Baby,
Today, I am 22 weeks pregnant! The storms of last week have calmed, praise Jesus. On Saturday, the union and the school board came to a tentative agreement, and all parties voted to ratify the contract on Sunday. I was able to go to school to retrieve my keys and computer that evening, and returned to my classroom Monday morning to resume teaching my students. I don’t think I’ve ever been so excited to be back in my classroom in my 7 and a half years of teaching at GLHS! Even if all I saw were my students' little squares on a virtual call, filled with nothing but their Google icons, I was overjoyed to be doing what I love to do, what God has called me today. This past week was our last in distance learning for now. This coming Monday we will begin our new model for Hybrid learning. I feel comfortable with the technology plan in place for the most part, although I am certain there will be a lot of extra time needed to meet the needs of all my kids, whether they are learning in person, at home, or staying virtual for the whole school year. I pray that God gives me the strength to accomplish everything that is necessary to support my kids, and that He blesses the technology to run smoothly!
Each week that goes by, things become more real for your impending arrival, sweet baby. On Sunday, your grandma and I continued our search for nursery furniture and I found a crib that I absolutely adored! Just like that, furniture has been ordered and will be arriving at our home in a few weeks! That means the work to clean out the spare room has to begin, so it’s a good thing my nesting instincts are in full swing. Every time I look in my closet for something to wear, I become irritated with how much is in there, and I have to quell the urge to just start purging everything while I need to be getting ready for work. That will be project number 1 this weekend! My goal is to condense my wardrobe so that it all fits in our master bedroom closet, in order to make way for the tiny clothes and other necessities that will be stored in the nursery closet soon. Your dad and I have also made a decision about our vehicles. Next weekend, your grandma and grandpa Miller will be coming to visit, and they have graciously offered to give us their Ford Explorer to replace your momma’s teeny, tiny car. Your dad has found someone to buy “the Lima Bean’ from us, so in one week or so, I will be saying goodbye to the lime green hatchback that has served me well for over 13 years. Many a road trip was made to Indiana in that car, and she withstood quite a bit in her years: a 100 year old tree falling on her in Washington D.C., stalling out on the incredibly steep Maytide Dr. in Pittsburgh, hauling teenagers to Twilight and Hunger Games movies, and a handful of fender benders (none of which were your mom’s fault, I swear!). She’s still chugging along just fine, and I hope that she continues on many adventures with the next owner. I will never forget all the journeys she made with me, which sounds silly because, seriously, it’s just a car- but this car served me well and I’m sad to part with her.
All of these things sound pretty awesome as we prepare for your arrival, but none of them compare to finally feeling my first moment of certainty that you are moving and grooving in momma’s belly!! The fizzy bubbles have turned into very clear flutters- the first time I felt it, I instantly knew what it was and why everyone calls it “flutters.” You continue to be a little wiggle worm, especially even the evenings when I’m sitting at my table studying or laying in bed watching TV. Each bubble and wiggle makes me smile so hard and brings another shy of relief. While my anxiety has not vanished- and probably never will- these flutters remind me that you are growing and very much alive in there, and continue to grow my confidence each day that you will be in my arms soon. You have started kicking hard enough for your daddy to feel yet, and I can’t wait for the day he gets to feel that movement for himself. In the meantime, I will cherish these sweet moments between you and me, and praise God with each one that He has blessed us with this little life.
Right now, you are the sizing of a coconut, weighing 15 ounces and measuring almost 11 inches. You are growing like crazy and starting to take up a lot of space in there. I’m definitely feeling it in my lungs- it can be hard to breath sometimes- and in my bladder- I pretty much have to pee ALL THE TIME. You are growing eyebrows and eyelashes to highlight what I’m certain are going to be beautiful eyes. Your skin is making keratin now, which will help create the outer layer of your skin and finger and toenail development. This also means you might be growing some hair on your head, too! Although, I do not anticipate you having great hair; you’ll probably get mom and dad’s super fine hair, so sorry in advance! Your hearing is increasing, which means you can hear my heart beat and every tummy rumble, which happens frequently since I’m always hungry!
I pray everyday that God continues to help you grow healthy and strong, and I thank Him for all the flutters and wiggles I can feel that let me know you are still there. I pray that, as things at work shift yet again, God helps me maintain my stress levels by granting me His peace and comfort. I praise Him that all the uncertainty from last week has been resolved, and I ask for His strength as we get into full swing preparing for your arrival, little one. Every one of these things is in His hands, so I ask that He continue to do His will.
I love you, little Rainbow Baby.
Love, Mommy
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