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April 1, 2021


To my Rainbow Baby, Henry,


Today, you are seven weeks old! You are growing like crazy, baby boy!!! We had our follow up with the pediatrician and lactation consultant yesterday, and you gained one and a half pounds since we started supplementing your feeds!! I am overjoyed that you are thriving and healthy, and I am happy that what we have been doing is working for all of us. When we worked with the lactation consultant, it seemed that you were transferring more during feeds than you had been when we started, so you are doing better eating and momma’s supply looks like it is increasing. Praise God that everything is getting on track!! I pray that we continue in this positive direction with all of these things.


This week, we said goodbye to Gram and Pops Miller after their extended stay to get to meet you. It has been so nice for them to be such a big part of the beginning of your life, and to have the extra help at home as we adjust to life as parents. We will see them again at the beginning of the summer, and it’s crazy to think that, by then, you will be four months old!! It was much quieter at home today, just me, you, and your puppy brother hanging out. It will take some time to get into our new routine where it’s just us at home, but I’m looking forward to the extra snuggle time with you. It won’t be long before you’re far too busy to cuddle with your momma!


This weekend is Easter, and I’ve been spending a lot of time today thinking about how my perceptive of this day has changed since you were born. The resurrection of Jesus has always had huge implications in my life- it means that I am saved from my sins, that by believing in who Jesus is, that I have eternal life in heaven with Him. It means that I am abundantly blessed in the land of the living, that though I don’t deserve it, that Jesus lives in me and guides my life as I walk this earth. But now it means so much more to me than I imagined it could. They say that becoming a mom means part of your heart is outside of your body, walking around in the child that you bore. For me that means that part of my faith in Jesus is doing the same. Jesus died for everyone, which means He died for me- and He also died for you, sweet Henry. He died to save you, too. Right now you are an innocent little baby, but someday you will grow up to be a little boy and eventually a young man, and though I hate to admit it now, you will stumble. You will sin. All people do. And you will need a savior just like the rest of us. As I look towards this Easter weekend, I’m very aware of the fact that Jesus died to give You eternal life.


As your mother, it is my mission from God to raise you in this faith- to teach you who Jesus is and what He did for you. This is both a great honor and utterly terrifying. The beginning of your relationship with Jesus rests in my hands. How I teach you and show you what it means to believe in Jesus will shape your faith for the rest of your life. When you grow up, it will be up to you to live out your faith, but as a child, it will be up to me to ensure that you meet Jesus and learn all about Him so that you have a solid foundation for your faith to stand on. I have always known that this would be my greatest role as your mother, but now that you are here and our first Easter is upon us, I am anxious that I am not up to the task. I do not want to steer you wrong. I do not want to turn you off to this journey. I do not want you to grow up and say, “This is not for me.” So this week, I ask God to equip me and help me to be the mother of faith that you need me to be. I ask Him to lead me in the right way to walk through my own faith, so that I can hold your hand and show you the way. I pray that He gives me the strength, courage, and wisdom to teach you all that you need to know to establish a firm foundation in Jesus, so that as you grow up, you grow in your faith to become a strong young man of God. I know that God has beautiful plans for you, baby boy. I pray that He makes me worthy to be the mother that you need to guide you there.


I love you, little Rainbow Henry.


Love, Mommy



 

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